Family Connection -- 7 Core Concepts

As you start this new semester of your life...shifting gears into "school mode" and out of that lazy summer rhythm...Make sure to keep my 7 T's for Connected Families somewhere you can see them.  When you make a decision, refer to the T's -- doing so will help keep you grounded and balanced.

Yes, we are all busy but by choosing to embrace the 7 core concepts, the 7 T's, our lives will become balanced. When we are living balanced lives we soar.

 
1. Tolerance: let the little things go.

 

2. Time Together: being together is what it’s all about.

 

3. Trial and Error: never give up just keep trying new approaches for a deeper connection with your kids.

 

4. Take it Out Into the World: practice compassion in action as a family.

 

5. Teach Less Listen More: honor each other’s viewpoints and dreams -- learn from your kids.

 

6. Tools For Living: agree on your family’s unique toolbox of beliefs for life.

 

7. Total Love: you can’t go wrong when you love deeply.

 

 

 

Twilight

I love that time of day when the hot summer sun has rolled away and the soothing blanket of night is not quite tucked over the world.  As I sit writing this on my laptop, I'm gazing out of my living room window and the creamy white hydrangeas are gently bobbing their heads as if in a gentle nod of thanks to the day -- their evening ritual.  Comet, our old Cocker Spaniel, lies at my feet, my children are healthy and life is good. 

I don't have the foggiest idea what I'm making for dinner, but somehow it doesn't matter on this tranquil summer twilight.  There are fresh tomatoes, zucchini, and basil from the farm stand and those amazing flash frozen chicken strips from Trader Joes (thawed in moments).  I'll come up with something.   

Stewart Wilde's quote: "Life was never meant to be a struggle" is my mantra today.  I'm attempting to be in the moment and savor my fleeting days of summer with my precious family gathered together.  Too quickly girls will be off to school and life inside this house will not vibrate at such a level.

Do me a favor.  Tomorrow, as the sun goes down, pause for just a moment and notice the softer light, feel the evening cool on your skin and say YES when your child asks to "say up a little longer!"

Get Rid of Guilt

GUILT...

I've heard from so many of you since the last post about struggling daily with guilt...We truly beat ourselves up for "not getting it all done."  And yet, it's not possible to have perfection -- or some magazine's definition of perfection -- on a daily basis.

If you find yourself feeling guilty for not being a perfect mom...use the guilt to push you into positive action or come up with strategies to let it go.  A long hot bath, a run, venting with a friend, a glass of wine...whatever it takes to drop the smothering sensation of guilt is good.

What I mean about guilt as a good thing is when we use it to make shifts in our lives that serve us.  For instance if we are guilty over not attending to the the pile of papers that we need to go through in order to get our taxes done...schedule the 1/2 hour to tend to them.  Guilt Gone!

Don't allow negative emotions to zap your energy for being fully present.  We get the gift of today and let's flourish in that rather than feeling badly over our failings.

What works to help you banish guilt?

Telephone Turmoil

I wish I was a cheery as this woman while on the telephone!  The truth is I'm beyond frustrated.  I needed to make a simple doctor's appointment for my daughter, an annual physical.  I timed it...start to finish the entire process took 45 minutes.  No kidding.  The doctor's phone number had been changed as her practice named changed...no luck in yellow pages.com...finally I tracked her down via the hospital she is affiliated with.  Then there is the 6 steps one has to go through on the automated phone system...arggggggggggg....holding for 10 minutes after that complicated set of maneuvers....a real person finally arrives....only to tell me "she's not in our system so you will have to call and preregister her with the hospital before setting up an appointment."  Yup, another 10 minutes to get through that ordeal...and you don't want to even hear the rest...THEN I shuddered to pick up the phone again to make an appointment for our cat at the vet....timed that one...on hold for 5 minutes....

These ordinary logistics of running a home and family can literally eat into our precious and limited time...What works for you?  I'm trying to reserve one morning a week to deal with all these sorts of things.  I still have to call the Ford dealership to schedule maintenance for the car, dentist for appointments for the girls and for me, pick up 4 dozen bagels for my daughter's crew race Saturday and of course my Costco membership has expired so ....  shall we figure in an extra 20 minutes to stand in line and renew that...

How do you get beyond discouraged at the time vampires sucking us dry when we try to arrange routine services.  I try to breathe deeply during the wait...drink a cold bottle of water...have my laptop open when on hold and do a bit of work...

Please share your:  Telephone Turmoil Tactics...I gotta go make a call...

Mommy Stress

Stress is when our minds say NO but our mouths open up and say YES.

I've heard from a lot of moms lately who are feeling more stress than usual...the winter months seem to be dragging on...kids were on Feb break...spring plans have to be made for sports, ...and the balance we all strive for may be teetering on the brink of frazzle.

For the next week I urge you to pay attention to what you say YES to -- both at work and at home.  Practice the fine art of saying NO when you feel deep within that you simply CANNOT.

Let me know how it goes.

Mimi